Me, Marsha Marie

  Dear Me  by Marsha Marie   Dear Me,  I know that at the time you are reading this letter you are only 17, and you think that you have all of the answers for everything. Well, you don't and you are about to make some of the biggest mistakes of your life. You may be wondering who I am, and how it is that I know so much about you. Well, I am you from the future. No seriously though! Yeah, you’re right, I did watch Back to the Future way too many times, but yea, I'm your future-self. So listen carefully. No, seriously, you have got to listen to me.   Soon you will meet a man that will change your life. His name is Tom. He will charm you, and convince you to do things that you will wish you had never done. (Don’t worry, no one else will find out what you did, but you will deeply regret those things.) You will fall head over heals and fall for the stupid shit that he says! He will convince you to marry him, and you will leave the country with him. Yep, that’s right...

(Me, with my new family in Kalu Kalan, Pakistan. 1992. We’re standing directly in front of the kitchen and the torn down room where Zain was born. Sponge rollers? I say, never leave home without them!) Ancient Ruins   (Excerpt from Bangles, My True Story of Escape, Adventure and Forgiveness, by Marsha Marie ) Another twelve hours in flight and we finally arrived in Pakistan. There seemed to be a thousand people at Islamabad Airport. The terminal was unwelcoming: brown walls and a metal ceiling. The roar of an unknown language swept through the congested area. Several luggage carousels filled the center. Zain said that we’d have to be quick getting our bags so that they wouldn’t be stolen. I kept a tight grip on both of the kids and followed him very closely.  We walked outside of the rustic terminal to an ocean of people. To be honest, I thought they were all there for us. I was in shock. How big is his family? Strangers from all different directions were grabbing me and hugg...

The Old Gray Door  by Marsha Marie Nancy slowly approaches the gray steel door. The silver plaque is barely legible through the tears flowing down her face. It seems just a few days ago she was holding little Tommy in her arms. That sweet smile and baby fresh smell rings thru her nostrils as she squeezes her eyes shut.  “My sweet baby boy. Mommy loves you so much. I will always be there for you!”  These words pound heavily on her head. Thirty years have passed. These promises are nothing but failed whispers today. She had been a great mother overall, but Nancy was not there yesterday, when Tommy needed her to stop him from driving his Harley in that condition. The long-ago promise was broken by a knock at the door by police. The hallway is dim and cold. Nancy clutches her purse. She knows she has to go in. She breaks her hand from the grasp, forcing it to reach for the door’s dreary handle. Her old ashy hand trembles. A pain shoots through her heart and down her arm. She ...

Dear Mom,  I was just thinking about you today; your birthday is coming up. It has been a while since we last spoke.  The kids have all grown up, and you would not even believe the baby. Time goes by so fast.  I am working as a corporate trainer now. I really love my new job. They allow me to experiment and explore. I love the freedom I have now. I guess, all those years teaching overseas has really come in handy.  It is amazing how much I look like you. When I look in the mirror, it is almost like I see you standing behind me. My nose and my eyes whisper your name. I love and miss you so much. I wish I could just pick up the phone and hear your voice.  I'm sorry Mom that I have still not been to your grave. I just cannot bear the pain. I want to remember your smile in my heart just like I did when I was gone.  I think of you everyday.  Bye for today Mom. I will write soon. Love, Sissy

Goju  Ryu  the style from old I feel the love or hate,  or fold Cobra Kai again today deep in the eye comes out to play Miagi-do wipe-off, wipe-on my childhood show  Karate Kid -- Kublai Khan strike first? strike hard?  no mercy? no first strike, I take Daniel Larusso, me make! Bonsai Daniel-son!!! Cobra Kai Season 2 is on!!! Bonsai!!!

Empathy by Marsha Marie feelings inside the touch of the skin embrace me  hold me don't you understand? ...i do ...i will ...i can ...i be ...the pain roars inside me alone  i feel no other  appears can anyone hear me? ...my heart ...my chest ...my breath ...my soul ...deafening you are to me

Sometimes the road is not what it may seem. Lately, new experiences have come my way. New exuberance, and experience. New sadness and new victories. I wondered if this was really for me. Can I make it? Then in a deep sleep, the answer came. Not the entire answer, but one that showed me the way. "This is for you right now." a gentle whisper showed. "The way will be a bit uncomfortable, but with little sacrifice. More is to come, trust in me." I awoke and realized....... I am right where I should be.